2003-11-23 - 11:30 a.m.

still alive.... ovaries definatley try to pop out of my stomach though! I look like I'm a couple of month pregnant, you know, just at the beginning, when you just pop out a little bit and people don't know if you are or aren't.... I don't know how to dress to camouflage it, because there is nothing more uncomfortable than having to explain that you're not pregnant!!!!

I'm boozing again! Don't worry, I'm no alchy, but the hormones definately make me feel like having a drink to relax. I made cocktails at home last night before we went to dinner (we had guests, so It was a good excuse) and I had a glass of wine with dinner. We did go to a margarita party later on but I stuck to diet soda, I didn't want to overdo the booze thing....

TV TALK

Loved, Loved "House Rules" this week! with their moms helping out, super good. I was really bummed though that the kids got 3rd place again, I thought they did a much better job than the grey paint effect from hell!!!!

Canadian Edition of While You Were Out was a bit disappointing... Whose idea was it to do a garden in Canada just before winter sets in..... Makes no sense! It looked nice, but by now, the whole thing must be grey and dead.... New carpenter was OK, but I need my Andrew! No Theresa, no Andrew, I won't keep watching!

Gotta work a couple of hours, but then I will go back to hybernating at home. Gotta doa bit of tidying up since the documentarians are coming to shoot tomorrow..... and Ultra-sound #2 tomorrow, watch this space for increased hormone shots.

Anything to add? 1

2003-11-21 - 2:21 p.m.

You get a second entry today.....

I'm sort of bored at work right now, read all my blogs, caught up on my TWoP boards, made cute little paper folders to hand out gift certificates in, and now I'm just waiting for our weekend girl to come at 4:00 to relieve me of my duties....

I got a haircut this morning. I read somewhere that it's not smart to get a haircut during in-vitro, 'cause the hormones cause you do make silly decisions. Like bleaching your hair or cutting it all off. I did neither of those things. My hair was really getting to long and very blah. So I gave the salon a call first thing this mornig and the first apointment was still available, so I hopped in my car and when for a little pampering. I have a weird hairdresser. Nice, but weird. He's your typcial urban gay stylish hair guy, but he does all the talking. As in couldn't care less what is happening in your life but will give you all the details of his! Don't get me wrong, he's funny and sweet, but don't you go to the hairdresser to bitch about your life!?!?

So he cut some lenght off and added layers. Not too much though, 'cause I need to be able to put it up for my friends wedding on new years. He's donig our hair that day, so he already started talking about what he'd like to do.

After my hair, I treated myself to a new top. We have a fundraiser to attend tomorrow night. It's geared at the young, hip people of the community. There will be lots of designer outfits. I have none. I didn't want to spend a lot, so I just got a nice silky chineese-type top with a matching belt (it's not really a belt, it doesn't hold up anything, more like a hip necklace!) I'll rummage around my closet for a skirt or pants to go with it. Frankly, I don't know how late we'll stay, I might be a total bitch by tomorrow night!!!

Oh, and did I mention that my old boyfriend, the one who's wedding I attend a few months ago, is coming to stay with us tomorrow night. With his wife.... Should be interesting!

Anything to add? 0

2003-11-21 - 12:53 p.m.

It's really hard to believe how quickly 225 UIs of 2 types of hormones can make you crazy... Actually, no mental effects quite yet, but I got wicked hot flashes last night. Bad enough to get down to a camisole and eat popsicles in November!

And no, it wasn't from screaming at the TV after they kicked off Rupert!!! I'm so fool, I knew it was going to happen, but still, there was a glimmer of hope that he would manage to pull through... Better luck in the All-Star edition! (he was absent from the Early Show recap this morning....)

To keep gonig with the TV theme, CSI sucked last night! That was one of the most boring episodes ever! The storyline was boring, nothing grabbed you, honestly, It's amazing we watched it all the way through. Half-way through, while in the midst of a hot flash, hubby looked at me and asked me if it was just him or was this episode horrible... I was so glad to hear him say that, I thought the hormones had already taken hold of my mind!!!!

What was excellent however was Without a Trace. Sort of redeemed the previous wasted hour.... Of course, bad CSI is still better than Bachelor Bob reunites with baby-voice freak... I liked Bob on Bachelorette, I liked him on Oprah, but boy of boy, he sucked as the Bachelor (and I'm not referring to all the kissing slurpy sounds!)

I'm looking forward to House Rules this weekend, along with the first CANADIAN EPISODE OF WHILE YOU WERE OUT!!!! Yeah Canada!

Anything to add? 0

2003-11-20 - 12:36 p.m.

so far, so good, of course, it's only been about 2 hours!!!!

The appointment was a total bitch though. My scan was scheduled for 9:45. They called my name at 11:00. The "doctor" (I always thought she was a technician) didn't say anything, just double checked I was the right patient and did the scan. That's right lady, just shove that probe in there and don't even introduce yourself. She told me to go ahead and start my hormones today. When I told her I didn't have a presciption yet, she seemed stunned. "what do you mean?". Well, usually I'm seen by a doctor, who does a scan, writes a presciption, sends me to the pharmacy and then I see the nurse to double check I still know how to shoot up. "Oh, I guess I can write the presciption..."

Hello? What? You're a doctor? You'll write the prescription? Would you like to review my file maybe?????

She wrote down the presciption and put in in the nurses box. I was meant to wait for the nurse to double check. But then I ran into another doctor, one who knows me, so she took a look a the thing, got the nurse, and then I was able to go to the pharmacy. Turns out, mrs unknown doctor got the UI quantites wrong. Not by much, but still! The nurse was able to double check with the doctor I like, they fixed it and then I got to shoot up. Like a junky, except in the folds of my stomach... That is the one good thing about having loose stomach skin from loosing weight: the injections are easy!

After we left the hospital, I started to feel really mad at the first doctor. I mean, this is serious, expensive business here, and she doesn't introduce herself, doesnt' take one minute to make sure we're on the same page, doesn't even write down the right quantities!!!! The camera crew wasn't with us this time, too short notice. But I can't wait to see if we get more attention when they come with us next time.....

Anything to add? 3

2003-11-19 - 2:04 p.m.

Ladies and Gentlemen (OK, who am I kidding, there are no male readers here!), we officially begin Round 3 of the hell known as In-Vitro Fertilization tomorrow morning at 9:45 am.

I got my period today, just as the nurse had predicted on the schedule. I totally thought I would be late a week, but I wasn't. So with my period, I was able to call the hospital to schedule my first scan and we will start hormones tomorrow. By *WE* of course, I mean ME. Hubby's involvement is limited to giving me progesterone injections AFTER inplantation. He doesn't get the hot flashes, the mood swings, the severe fatigue or bone aches..... he does however get extra work hours and cooking duty, 'cause if I feel like crap, I'm not too nice to customers!

I dont' know how to feel about this cycle. It's the 3rd one, so I'm not afraid of the shots, the side-effects, I know what to expect. I am afraid however, of getting my hopes up, only to watch them shattered. Or not to get my hopes up and then wish I had been more positive..... It's a fine line to walk.....

Over the next 3 weeks, you can expect more frequent postings, many of which could seem like they were written by a complete lunatic. You would be right. Because these hormone injections will drive me completely bonkers. In about 5 days, I will wish I hadn't started this and wonder out loud why I'm doing this to myself. Try to remind me. Try to remind me that it might lead to becoming a mother. 'Cause in the midst of the insanity, I might loose sight of the goal.

As for my husband, I would like to write him a blanket apology for whatever I might say or do in the next 3 weeks that may offend or hurt him, cause him to run to stores looking for whatever I might be craving etc. Honey, just think about it this way, if it works, you'll have 9 more months to look forward to!

The crazy hormone train is just about to leave the station... All Aboard!

Anything to add? 3

2003-11-18 - 11:14 a.m.

I can only imagine how mothers feel when their kids are sick... Our little Lucy has been scratching herself something fierce for weeks now. After many mis-diagnosis from the vet, we finally got an appointment with the Head-Vet at the clinic, whom we love. He took one look at her and diagnosed her with a seasonal contact allergy (she runs in weeds, the weeds give her a rash). The crazy thing is, my hubby bought a home-vet book and read it when this all started. He figured it out right away, but this other (rather incompetent) vet just shrugged it off. LEt me tell you, my husband felt vindicated yesterday, too bad poor little Luly had to suffer for weeks, not to mention our lack of sleep over the last 5 days as she scratches herself silly all night. Thankfully, a shot of antihistamine and a couple of weeks of pills should clear it right up.

I'm in holding mode right now. Waiting for my period. The hospital nurse calculated it should arrive on teh 19th, I'm usualy late so I figure the weekend or early next week. The funny thing is, now we have a team of documentarians also waiting for my period! How crazy is that?! I had a bizzare conversation yesterday with one of the filmakers, discussing my crankyness, cramping, etc., trying to guess when the filming could begin! Unreal... There might actually be a hiccup with this whole thing. The head doctor at the fertility clinic hasn't given them the goahead to film our procedures yet. They are still waiting to meet him and find out if they can film us. Technically, they can film us anyways, but if he doesn't allow it, they wouldn't be able to film at the hospital or interview the researchers, so I guess they wouldn't be too interested in our story if they can't get full access. So as we all wait for my period, we also wait for his approbal... Double weird.

Anything to add? 0

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