pure, evil, genius!

2003-10-31 - 1:33 p.m.

It's Halloween today, but it's also Friday, which means we will not be handing out candy tonight.... boo.... LAst year, I ran all over town looking for Kosher candy. 99% of the kids who come to my house don't care if the candy is Kosher, but I didn't feel comfortable giving out un-kosher candy. This year, it's Shabbat, so the problem solves itself. I will make a sign for the door, otherwise people might rign the bell, which would be pointless and drive the dogs nuts!

OK, now the important stuff: Mark Burnett is the devil. He is an absolute television genius, which of course, makes him the devil.... Now, when you get booted off the island, they actually just keep you in a holding pattern, feeding you rations, SO YOU CAN WIN YOUR WAY BACK INTO THE GAME!!!! This is absolute, pure genius! Of course, it'll only work this once, but still, kudos. I take my hat off to you, MB!

We're supposed to do a third attempt at IVF in November. But I've been feeling physically pretty crappy lately, and with my mom's stuff going on, I thik we might decide this weekend to wait a bit. This would mean waiting til February, 'cause december is too crazy at the store for me to be home with hormone-mania, and we are going on vacation in january. So looks like we might be waiting til February. Hopefully my few remaining eggs can hang on thil then!

Anything to add? 0

when all else fails, think about TV

2003-10-29 - 4:05 p.m.

Since G-d isnt' too likely to answer my letter, I took a deep breath, had a Starbucks Latte in a bottle, read some blogs, did some accounting, and now, I feel a bit better. (nothing like a little accounting to calm your nerves!)

In order to cheer myself up, I decided to type up a second entry today, about, whatelse, TV (OK, shopping was a close call, but I haven't been since the weekend, and there is only so much I can write about how much I love my new Naot shoes)

So last night was the beginning of the most kickass show ever, 24. So Jack was undercover and now has a drug problem. It's about damm time! How perfect could a guy be? And they gave Kim a job at CTU. Farfetched, but less unlikely than getting somehow caught up in yet more mayhem while having nothing to do with her father's work. It's been 3 years, she could have gone to school and learned something. At least, we know she how she does under pressure (and apparently *who* she does....)

Bitchelle and Tony are married, isn't that sweet... I loved the close up on the rings, long before any reference was made verbally. Great work editors!

My other guilty pleasure last night was Joe Millionaire Part Deux. These girls all look like they've been ridden hard and put away wet, except for Lina, who actually looks intelligent and sweet, which of course means she'll be playing the role of Zora in this year's installments.

Now, I've never blogged about Jessica Simpson because I rarely catch the show. In Canada, it's on wednesday nights, again West Wing and The Bachelor. There is only so much one girl can watch, even with time shifting! But I caught a few episodes, and last week's sticks in my mind. By now, everyone knows what a twit she is. Tuna, buffalo wings, 700$ panties, I don't need to tell you. But what is *he* doing with her??? He seems like a nice guy. He obviously has a good head on his shoulders. He won't pay for someone else to decorate their house (I loved that argument. She doesn't knnow what she wants, she wants to pay a stranger to do it for them, but doens't think *he* should do it!!!), he invites his buddies over to move stuff, including what had to be the most adventurous, life-threatening move of furniture I've ever been witness to. Dude, I understand you want to do stuff yourself. I'm beyond impressed that you hung all your pictures and moved your office to build Barbie a closet, but that huge triangluar piece of furniture, on a ladder, over a ravine.... pay a couple of movers! Seriously.

Anything to add? 4

an open letter to g-d.

2003-10-29 - 1:43 p.m.

OK, G-d, how much more?

When I was studying for my conversion to judaism, one of the ideas that most appealed to me was that G-d has a plan for everyone. You make daily decisions that affect your life, but the general plan has been laid out for you long in advance. Also, G-d doesn't throw anything in your path that you can't handle. That goes both for the positive and the negative. If you get it in your life, it's cause HE thinks you can handle it, somehow.

So what I wanna know is, how much more does HE think I can take? Seriously. First, I find the man I truly love, but he has a serious disease that will eventually claim his life. Then, it turns out I carry the gene that causes this disease, so we have a 50/50 chance of passing it on to our children. We've tried two rounds of invitro, both unsuccesful, and found out that I'm in very early menopause and that chances are, it's not gonna happen.

In the last month, my mother had surgery on her leg to remove and cancerous melanoma that looked small on the outside and turned out to be several inches on the inside. My younger brother had surgery for polyps caused by the same digestive problems that have plagued me for years. My husband had to have is yearly IV treatment 'cause he wasn't feeling well. And yesterday, after some follow up tests for her leg, my mom was told she had a large growth in one of her breasts. She's meeting the surgeon on Monday. We don't know if it's cancer yet, won't know until they go in and look into it.

But seriously, G-d, how much more. I had my own doctor's appointment today because I've been sleeping 10 hours a day and needing to take a nap in the afternoon just to get through the day. I couldn't share the driving back from Toronto 'cause I couldn't keep my eyes open... So we're going to do blood tests to check my tyroid, my iron, my sugar.... Could just be that I'm so *tired*, of taking care of everyone, of not having one second to think....

I really can't complain. I have an easy job, short hours, I come and go as I please. I have a cleaning woman who does my laundry. But still, there are not enough hours in the day. I don't know what I would do if I had a child to take care of. Obviously, I would make time. I would cut back. So what can I do now to help myself? I don't need to wait for a kid to make my life better. But I don't know what to cut back on.

I skipped Hebrew class on Monday night, I didn't want to yawn in their faces. I've missed several cookbook meetings that didn't require my presence. But I enjoy Hebrew class and the cookbook meetings are making me meet nice women that I would love to be friends with. So letting go of these "commitments" feels like I'm cheating myself out of things that I actually enjoy. I could stop writing this blog. But 10 minutes a day seems like nothing, and it feels good to bent, to get things out of my system....

While I ponder what I can do to relieve some of the stress, and prepare to fast for a battery of blood tests tomorrow morning, I just wonder out loud: How much more? Are you sure this was all meant for me?

Anything to add? 2

Shopping, more shopping, and oh yeah, a famous person!

2003-10-28 - 10:18 a.m.

What a weekend! Total Wirlwind!

We went to Toronto for the wedding of one of hubby's closest and dearest friends (he was best man at our wedding, hubby was his). We did a ton of shopping at some favorite TO spots, like Fresh Collective, Eza, Banana Republic (don't have in Montreal), and discovered new stores, like Lucie's (had to go in just because of the name!!!) and my new favorite Prairie Dogs, which sells my new obsession Naot Shoes. I've been a Hush Puppies and Camper girl, but these Naot shoes are something else..... Style and comfort, plus they'e made in Israel, so it's a win-win all around!!!)

On Saturday night, the bride's parents held a little party at their house for all the under-40 crowd, so his friends and her friends could meet. It was really fun.

Now, I don't know how to tell this story without giving away the person's name, but I'll try. The groom went to university in the States for his undergrad, before coming back home to become a doctor. While in the states, he was friends with and roomed with a guy in his faculty. The guy used to dabble in Modeling, and now has a somewhat successful movie carreer. One of his movies is of the art-house variety, but he most recenlty played a bad guy in a very popular movie. He's not a household name, YET! but trust me when I tell you this, he will be.

So this movie guy was at the party on Friday night. I was somewhat nervous and giddy at the prospect of meeting him. I knew of him through the groom, through his movies, and through stories that I've read because of an even more famous person he used to date.

My husband, ever the comedian, introduced us, having met him back in the days of US university. At first, it was totally weird talking to him. But I quickly got over it, and we just talked about the groom, my husband, and the highjinks they used to get into as students. I realised, this movie guy is just a totally normal guy, who just happens to make movies with famous people....

The funniest thing was that most people in attendance at the party had no idea whatsoever who he was. The bride was born in Israel and had a lot of visiting relatives. The big movie hasn't been released in Israel yet, so most people didn't even believe it when they were told who he was....

At the wedding, I felt a little bad for the guy. He only knew a few people, and the table he was at was not too chatty, so I got up a few times to go talk to him and make sure he was having a good time. I really hope I wasn't being too groupie-like. I kept conversation related to the bride and groom, to cities we'd both been to, nothing movie related. Except I did tell him if he ever filmed a movie in Montreal, he had to get in touch, we would show him around the hot spots (Yah! Right!!! I couldn't get past the bouncers!!! Maybe if I brought my picture with Kelly Ripa!!!)

A the end of the night, one of the catering staff did walk over and ask for an autograph, but otherwise, I think he probably just had a good time at his friend's wedding. Oh, and he should think of branching into musicals, he serenaded the happy couple with Elvis' "Can't help falling in love" and was really good!!!

(OK, I don't think I gave away too much, his identity is still protected, except if you happen to have been in Toronto for a wedding this sunday!!!)

Anything to add? 2

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