Mommy and me shopping day

2004-11-19 - 12:38 p.m.

The Dumpling and I went errand crazy this morning and by golly, she cooperated nicely. We had to go to the wrapping supplier to pick up holiday bags for the store, then off to the dog allergist to get Lucy a refill on her allergy shots. These two locations are on opposite sides of town, so Dumpling sat in her car seat, clapping away at her favorite CD: The soundtrack to Hairspray! That's my girl! (mind you, wehn she's in Daddy's car, they rock to Dan Zane and she likes that just as much)
We've been trying to ween her off the 2 naps a day and switch her to one long post lunch nap. Still the same amount of sleeping, but merged into one 2 hour block. So far, so good.

In light of this new schedule, I took her to the mall at 11:00 to try to keep her awake and atempt to make it to GAP, which I've been meaning to do since the holiday ads came out. I really thought I would buy the empire-waist pink tweed dress, but when I tried it on, it was about 3 inches above my knees... I don't do short skirts or dresses. So instead, I got the lovely black velvet blazer with bow that SJP sports in some of the ads, a little satin top with cute silver buttons and a pair of brown/pink tweek trousers. This doesn't go togheter, I realize that, but I can mix and match with lots of other stuff in my closet and it should solve any holiday clothing crisis I might face. I'm only one size smaller than last year, so I can still use last year's pieces.

And speaking of things that don't match or make outfits: Maria gets my all time worst dressed award for those crazy outfits she sported last night! I'll miss the *rejected-by-Michael-Jackson* collection.... I will not miss the incessant blinking and finger pointing... Too bad Wes had to go down with the ship.

Anything to add? 2

Butt pictures!

2004-11-18 - 11:37 p.m.

even though it's past 11:30, the TWOP servers are too busy to let me connect to the Forums, so let me get this out of my system:

A DOUBLE FIRING! I did not see that coming, but honestly, it was the only fair thing to do, because my goodness they both SUCKED! MAria: they won't actually use your catalogue, so it's better to use a bad butt picture and show your intentions than no butt pictures at all.....

(I've gone and done it now. let's see how many Google hits I get tomorrow with Butt picture 3 times in one entry!)

Anything to add? 1

Screaming wrestlers, blue hair and horns: TAR 6!!!!

2004-11-17 - 3:21 p.m.

what can I say really about last night TAR6 season premiere.... I made myself a nice cocktail, which I NEVER do, even made some snacks (cheese, crackers and sweet gherkins) and settled in for this 2 hour reality gem.

I found too many of the teams to be severly annoying (blue haired nutcase, the wrestlers, demon-boy), but still, nothing could keep me from cheering and screaming as mistake after mistake was skillfully pointed out by the amazing editors (diesel again? missing the waterfalls? searching 7 square miles of water? Isn't a prerequisite of applying for the show having actually WATCHED the show before?)

Also, I was all set to write a nice entry of apology to my daughter about yesterday's post, since she was so well behaved last night at dinner and sat in her high chair the whole meal and only spilled once, but she started her mornign by biting half my face off, kicking me repeatedly during diaper change and screaming her head off incessantly until my mother came to pick her up for her grandma and me day, at which point she turned all smiles, jumped into her grandma's arms and started waving bye bye to me. So long ma! So I'll reserve my apology for another day....

Finally, I'm toying with the idea of migrating from diaryland to somewhere else, where the templates would be snazzier (it's a pain the rear to have a remotely cute template in diaryland). Any recommendations?

Anything to add? 4

Have you seen my baby? The Boobahs took my baby!

2004-11-16 - 4:04 p.m.

Have you seen her? Because at some point when we weren't looking on Sunday, someone switched our lovable, laughing and happy Dumpling and replaced her with the Devil's Spawn.

I know, those are harsh words from a mother, but seriously, what the heck is going on with this child? Suddenly, the mere touch of my hand on her back is enough to send her into a tailspin of screaming and rolling on the floor. She won't sit in the high chair for more than 47 seconds and she will not let go of her blankie (I never meant for her to have a blankie, it just sort of happened....). It's like she's suddenly developed hypersensitivity, like I've seen in autistic children. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing actually wrong with her, It's definately us, we're somehow not getting what's going on. She's just been in a sour mood, but what the heck are we supposed to do in the mean time? She won't eat, won't drink, won't nap, she won't let me hold her, only wants her dad, but the minute her comforts her, something else sets her off and we start the cycle all over again.....

So while I take refuge at work for a few hours, I thought I would try to pay homage to Mimi Smartypant's absolutely dead on entry about Maisy and try to describe to you the joy that is my daughter's favorite show, Boobah.

If you don't have a toddler and have been spared the horror that is Boobah, lucky you. It starts off with a whishy-washy 80's pastel rainbow that turns into 5 white pods, each of them cradling a different colored Boobah. The Boobah's themselves are similar to Teletubbies, large round bouncy creatures with pixie heads and very large eyes. There's a purple one, blue, yellow, orange and.... wow, I actually forgot one, but I'm gonna guess green.

The five Boobahs gently awaken in their pod and start flying around the sky in a dizzing spin. They speak in an uncomprehensible language that I would best describe as baby-japanese. When the Boobahs finally land on the ground, they start running around like toddlers high on sugar at a birthday party. But then, the weird music starts and the baby-japanese narator calls one Boobah, who runs to the front-center of the screen and goes through it's reset mode. It stands there and it's weird twinkle-light eyebrows start flashing, it's eyes move from left to right, and once the reset process is over, the Boobah proceeds to do an exercise/dance move. Sometimes it does jumping jacks, sometimes it shuffles from side to side, you get the idea. Here is where it gets extremely annoying (well, more annoying that it already was). EACH of the other FOUR Boobahs goes through this same process, one at a time..... Boobha number two gets called, runs to the center of the screen, goes to the reset routine and begins exercising in synchronicity with Boobah number one. This takes about a minute. Then, number three follows suit, then number four, and finally, number five. By the time all five of them are moving about like demented synchronized swimmers, I'm ready to turn the darn thing off.
That's when you get saved from the crazy colored marshmallows by the child/children of the day and their art project from hell. In each episode a different child or group of children dance around a circular pit with a homemade box, decorated with bits and pieces of tissue paper and glitter. Emenating from this craft project is our friend, the 80's pastel rainbow. This magic-mushroom-enduced rainbow transports you to the alternate universe of this show, where you meet the *real* characters: Grand-papa, Grand-mama, Mrs Lady, Mr Man, Brother and Sister, Aunty something or other and a dog. These people are a of different ethnicity, making it one kooky family. The next five minutes is spent watching any assortment of these family members going through an activity. We seem to always catch the episode where Grandpapa tries to drink a glass of milk but keeps getting interrupted by is needy grandchildren, runs out of milk and ends up having to milk a magically-appearing cow.....

I actually googled the show and found their official website.... it's even scarier on the web somehow...

Wait a minute, maybe the Boobahs switched my baby! Must investigate immediately!

Anything to add? 4

Testing motherhood, by a professional!!!!

2004-11-15 - 11:10 p.m.

Ladies, I haven't abandoned you.... I'm still here, trying to get through the mommy day more or less in one piece!

Since I last regaled you with stories from my life, we kept Dumpling home from the Santa parade and avoided any further dicussion of the topic with my mother. But she did keep her regular Wednesday babysitting apointment, so I guess things aren't so bad after all.

I have decided to forgo the annual Hanukah Pajama festival (where I sew 15 pairs of flannel pajamas for 10 nephews and nieces and 5 non-related children) and instead replace them with Hanukah knitted hats, because these days, I can get the yarns and sticks out much easier than I can get to the sewing machine, and I just don't fancy a couple of all nighters this year. I hope the kids arent't too disapointed, but it's the best I can do.

Today, we had a social worker come *inspect* us for the 6 month post adoption follow up report we have to send to China in a few weeks. Of course, the mailman rang the doorbell 15 minutes into the morning nap, setting off a chain of minor Dumping-related disasters, including ruining the morning nap, biting and kicking until her daddy came home for lunch, having a complete and total meltdown after lunch that required a major time-out in her crib, which led to a very early afternoon nap which meant that by the time the social worker got there at 4:30, instead of a cheery and perky Dumpling, we were entertained by whining, constant attention seeking and general fussiness. She kept going to the lady and trying to get her to pay attention to her. I didn't know what to do. this woman is taking notes on our parenting skills: do I try to engage Dumpling to get her away, do I let her do it to show how nicely she bahaves towards stangers.... We did a bit of both, which led to a few minor tantrums, but eventually she settled down and the lady said something to the effect of: "well, see now, she's sitting nicely reading a book" which of course I understood to mean : your child is totally misbehaved and you'll be lucky if you get to keep her! I'm only slightly exxagerating!

In other news, I'm totally addicted to Regency House Party and Brandon's Quest for the best. The Bachelor meets Manor House! Why didn't I think of that? And Richard Brandon? Blows Trumps socks off in an instant! Charming and Crazy and filthy rich... a delightful combination AND Sara from Spanks is a contestant (It's the only item I've ever bought off the TV! and I bought them because I found her to be so charming and entrepreneurial!)

I was dleighted to see Chris go on the Apprentice, he was just such an ass. As for Sarge, I didn't care. I don't really care about the men on Survivor, I want to see what will happen on the women's side, I'm rooting for an all female finale!

And of course, TAR6!!! I don't even have words to express how excited I am. I mean, if the Dumping suddenly started talking, I'd be more excited, but only slightly!

Anything to add? 5


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Copyright Mortimerís Mom 2004. But just ask, I give my permission easily!